Almost from the moment I turned eighteen I’ve felt pressure to figure out exactly what I’m meant to be doing with my life. Not a huge, crushing weight bearing down on me, but a silent expectation living in a corner of my subconscious. Most of the time I’m not even thinking about it, but it’s there.
I trained as a dancer for the most part of my school years, and the dream was always to become a professional. And then, just like that, an emergency operation at the beginning of audition season destroyed any hope of getting in to a professional school at eighteen. With my plans ruined, I set about finding another occupation for that year. My friends got accepted into schools one by one, and I began an internship at my church.
For the next year I battled with the questions, “Why did this happen?” “Could God possibly have a different plan?” “If so, what is it?” I was convinced that I had to have my vocation decided. The race of life had begun and I had hit the ground running without a map, or even a path! At some point during that year I realised that yes, God did have a different plan for me. Opportunities and dreams opened up in other areas, but none in dance. Not going to lie, this was the scariest most unsettling thing ever. I had spent years working towards a goal and now God was gently altering my course. Here is the point where I began to learn some of the most valuable lessons, that still affect me to this day, and no doubt I will keep on learning for the rest of my life.
“A person’s steps are directed by the Lord.
How then can anyone understand their own way?” Proverbs 20:24 (NIV)
You would think that when you put this verse in front of a strategic thinker like me, it would totally freak them out. I mean, this is talking about releasing all control over your own path! But actually, I find it strangely therapeutic – if I’m not the one in control, then that means pressure off! My responsibility shifts from planning the steps to trusting someone else to do it. And that’s the key: trust. I know that I can trust God to direct my steps because, for a start, He’s outside of time and knows exactly what’s around the corner when I have no clue. But more than that, I can trust Him because I know He loves me and has only planned good things for me!
“’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’” Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
So be encouraged, instead of worrying and putting pressure on yourself to create this perfect life. Know that you can totally trust God and that He has everything worked out for your good. If I can let it go, you can too, and together we can throw our heads back and smile whilst knowing that the best is yet to come.
By Yemisi Joy
@_YemisiJoy