(Having been sexually active, how to stay pure 5 ways to walk in freedom and restoration)
Sexual purity is not the easiest thing to talk about. Even with your closest friends it can be the taboo subject that is skirted around and pushed under the carpet. Yes, sex is a tricky one. Although made to be a beautiful act, it can become a thing of ugliness, guilt and lies. Despite what you may have been told, losing your virginity is not the end of the line for you. It’s not a black and white subject. Sexual purity is not just about the physical act – it’s about the state of your mind. You can live a life of sexual purity despite past mistakes. There is nothing that God can’t wash as white as snow.
Here are 5 things to do while walking in freedom and restoration despite having been sexually active:
1. Sin is sin
There is no ‘bad to worse’ scale when it comes to sin. Sexual sin is no exception to this rule. Sure, it may feel like sexual sin is worse than other things that we struggle with, but rest assured that it isn’t. Sexual sin can be dealt with in the same way that we deal with all other aspects of sin in our lives: confession and repentance which breeds forgiveness and freedom. Don’t dwell on it and punish yourself, it is finished, go ahead and live.
2. It’s not black and white
Don’t believe the lie that says that once you’ve lost your virginity you’re a lost cause. So many people lose their virginity, regret it and then feel that they may as well continue to have sex because they think they’ve crossed a line and that they can never go back. This is not true. You can’t turn back the clock but even if you’ve had sex, you can still find restoration and live a life of renewed commitment to sexual purity.
3. Choose your future
You have the keys to your future. Sexual sin does not need to be a part of it. Stay strong, pursue righteousness and cling to God. Regardless of where you’ve been or what you’ve done, you can find freedom and leave your past mistakes behind you. It’s your life and your choices. Choose to make good ones. God is by your side. Together you can do anything.
4. Honesty
Whilst it’s important not to fix your eyes on your past mistakes, it’s vital to be honest with your boyfriend or girlfriend. It may be an awkward conversation to make but what comes from it will be fruitful. Talk about your weaknesses, lay out your boundaries and draw your lines. Knowing where you both stand will motivate you to stand strong and make you determined not to cause your partner to stumble.
5. Persevere despite temptation and mistakes
The road may not be an easy one. There may be twists and turns, mountain tops and valleys. If you stumble, confess, repent and rise up. Make Jesus your focus and things will get easier. God wants His people to find wholeness and overcoming sexual sin is part of that journey. Get up, brush yourself down and start again.
So don’t be disheartened. Don’t look at how far you’ve fallen but instead look at how far you’ve come. Be kind to yourself. Get accountable. Be honest. Celebrate the successes. You will get there.
Written by Jess Wilson
TweetMe @MsJessWilson