Neil Sedaka (most of you probably won’t have a clue who that is) said it best when he wrote his famous song Breakin’ Up Is Hard To Do. When listening to the lyrics of this song, it’s apparent that the emotional sting of a bitter break up is as true today as it was in 1962, when Sedaka first recorded this surprisingly upbeat little tune. Fast forward to this decade, and the songs in Adele’s massively successful album, ’21’, are yet another reflection of how personal and gut-wrenching breakups can really be, leaving even the toughest of us like vulnerable, sad little puppies. Obviously every romantic relationship that ever blossomed since the dawn of time didn’t survive “till death did them part”. Sometimes breaking up, or taking a break, is necessary; a difficult move for the greater good of both people in the relationship.
It was near the end of August last summer when a little argument between my boyfriend and I took a turn for the worst. Two hours of disagreements, short bouts of shouting and crying, eventually ended with a final goodbye. We were done. The next morning, I woke up with a heavy heart, but figured he’d come crawling back–I mean, we weren’t going to throw three and a half years of love and friendship away just like that…right? Days passed and still no phone call. To make matters worse, I was due to write the MCAT (Medical College Admissions Test) in a few days, and couldn’t seem to concentrate on anything other than the crisis in my relationship.
After four months of barely any contact, and after much soul-searching, prayer, and patience, my boyfriend and I reconnected, deciding that we still loved each other and would like to work things out. They say hindsight is 20/20, and with all the drama and heartache (of that specific time) behind us, I can honestly say that spending some time apart actually did us good. We appreciate each other more now, and are learning to put Christ and prayer in the center if our relationship, so as to not repeat the mistakes of the past and fall back into old habits. No matter how difficult it was to be broken up, God needed to work on both our hearts, and re-prioritize our individual lives.
Growth is never easy, otherwise it wouldn’t be growth. The Lord kept presenting me with two keys Scriptures, James 1: 2-5 and Philippians 4: 4-7, to help me and give me peace in the midst of my storm. I had to learn to trust in Him, and rely on what He was telling me to do, and seek His will for me. God was also specifically trying to teach me patience, and learning to be consistent in prayer as I pass through times of heartache. Sometimes going on a break, or straight up breaking up with someone may be what God wants you to do. It may be that your boyfriend or girlfriend is not the person He has for you, or your significant other is distracting you from what should be your first priority–God. Or, it may even be that you need to take some time to focus on other aspects of your life, such as school, your family, or work. Whatever the reason, the bottom line is that God wants to be first in our lives and our hearts. Ultimately, His plan for our lives is the best plan, and that may or may not include the person you are currently dating.
Breaking up is not easy, and I don’t think any sane person would say that it is. But if that is where the the Lord is leading you, then follow, and simply trust Him. I know people throw those words around all the time, but take it from someone who went through it, at the end of the day, God loves you and wants the best love story for your life with the person that He has for you.
Written by Octavia Ahsan
@OctaviaFaith
For those of you who have never heard the county sounds of Neil Sedaka… Check this out
[vsw id=”tbad22CKlB4″ source=”youtube” width=”425″ height=”344″ autoplay=”no”]